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The Eternal Son of God

Growing up and leaving home is, truly, a great part of human life; it's when one steps 'alone' into reality to survive on one's own merit. Oh parents are always there to catch you if you fall but the joy of making your own decisions comes from the triumphs achieved by your independent thoughts.

It occurred to me, if one were to buy into the Bible stories, Jesus would have experienced that human 'trial', the leaving his childhood home rite-of-passage and freedom to act without Virgin Mummy or Ole Joe looking over his shoulder.
However, when you transpose that paradigm onto the dynamics of Jesus' 'true' family, no similar rite-of-passage could ever occur; Jesus can never leave home and do his own thing because the ever-present super-daddy god is always watching! Ye Grand Olde beardy one knows every last thing in baby boy's head forever!
'God' is never going to die, retire, slip into dementia or a coma, or in any other way ‘step down’, so Jesus is never going to get the chance to be an independent adult; take the reigns etc. Always the bridesmaid, eh? A long term, if you’ll permit the pun, laddie in waiting; he's a permanent heir-only, for eternity!
And his relationship to super-daddy is that of an adopted child meeting with his long-lost ‘biological’ father who has been circumstantially, or irresponsibly, absent for the entirety of his formative years; only in Jesus’ case it’s way more complicated than that, he didn’t meet super-daddio until after he was already thirty-something and, oh yes, let’s not forget, was already dead! And, when that 'new' parent in your life announces ‘he’ has total control over all your future aspirations, that’s going to be a little more weird and stressful than the experience of ordinary human adopted child, isn’t it?

And then there’s his relationship with both his earth parents, Mary and Joseph; a bit strained?
They were both Jewish, so, if they were good Jewish citizens, abiding by rules of the religion with which they were enthralled, they would have been disallowed from recognising 'their' boy as the son of his 'true' father.
They would have died Jewish, wouldn't they? If so, and it’s likely considering they could not have been Christian (The unHoly Roman Empire didn't pen their “son’s” story until AD61), neither of them could have been ‘Christened’ (accepted Jesus as saviour).
Now, if we are to accept the hype, about ‘biological’ daddy’s rules, neither can stroll twixt those gates-oh-so-pearly and so, must be in hell?
Would Jesus get visiting rights?
And wouldn’t their eternal tormenting by God’s enforcer under bio-pop’s laws put even more tension into the relationship between him and his ‘real’ dad?

But it gets worse…
If, as Bible scholars seem to agree, Asherah was in fact the wife of God (Article) then doesn’t that irrevocably reduce Jesus’ Old mum’s status in the heavenly Who’s Who?
Doesn’t it relegate Mary’s position in the family tree to merely God's 'bit on the side'? And simultaneously demote Jesus; born out of wedlock to a mere concubine, or at best surrogate, to a doubly illegitimate heir? Prying his greedy digits further from the crown?
It doesn’t really matter either way, as far as the rules of accession are concerned, because, no matter what, as I stated earlier, he's never gonna get a sniff of the grand beardy's throne, but still, he can’t be best chuffed at the family dynamic, can he?

Further, if we are being honest, neither he nor any of us for that matter, actually knows ‘God’ is his father because his 'seed' was sent, if I remember correctly, by DHL which if I’m not mistaken and y’know, I’m not, carries the earthly social status of Jesus into the realm of actual Bastard.
I suppose it's only fair, given what we found out about ‘Bio-pops’ in “Let's think about God.”; like father, like son, eh?

As a side note, while we’re here, can I just say, about Sky Daddy…
Not even showing up to ‘do the deed’ with the prospective mother of your child...
How despotic, conceited or busy do you have to be to think that's acceptable behaviour?

Anyway, the former ‘ickle baby Jesus’, now big, powerful S.O.D (son of deity), has had a couple of thousand years of this crucifying situation so far. You reckon the poor sod’s self harming yet?
Might there be a deal with the Devil on the horizon?

So, by ‘our’ standards how dysfunctional is this divine dynasty? I reckon they'd get a slot on Jerry Springer in a flash; Jerry may even have devoted a whole show to the tangled web of immorality God wove to teach humans how ‘absolute morality’ works!
Although, I suppose it’s only to be expected, God is heralded as bigger and better, at everything, than any human who ever lived so it stands to ‘reason’ that he should also be the patriarch of the ultimate dysfunctional family.

So here we are at the end with, as usual, no conclusive answers and we’re left with one further question.
They say that Jesus mission was to come to earth to discover the actuality of being human, which is confusing because God is also supposed to be both himself and Jesus and also omniscient, so he should have already known what it was like, but we’ll ignore that complication.
In Jesus’ case, the before, the during and the after of his life were all entirely different to every other human’s experience; no human who ever lived, ever had a life like his is supposed to have panned out! I mean quite apart from all the trials, ‘miracles’, persecution and y’know actually chatting with Satan, you never hear of him, and to be clear not all the following examples are taken from my own life, you never hear of him having Piles, a dodgy knee from an old sporting injury, toothache, a case of the clap or a slapped face from overly eager advances to one he admired. Given what is written about him, is it not a wild stretch of intellectual honesty for anyone to claim Jesus experienced a human life?
And so, by any measure, wasn’t his ‘mission to humankind’ the most spectacularly epic fail in the history of the universe?

Although after saying all that, have a look around, nearly every family on earth is somewhat dysfunctional; maybe I just accidentally stumbled on the proof of god that everyone’s been hunting for?

Nah, probably not, eh?

This is one of the Too Many Questions

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